A Sudden Realisation - Twilight

After very careful consideration, and taking into account i've read all of the books, am re-reading the first one, and have seen the movie twice, I have come to realise something. I'm a Twilight fangirl. But unlike the million or so other gilrs out there, i'm not obsessed with Edward. Nor am I with Jacob, or any of the other boys. It's Bella. And no, i'm not lesbian. That's not quite what i'm getting at.. so let me back up a bit for you.

So there I was, stumbling upon Twilight a while back, borrowed it from a friend and got reading. At first I thought little of it, it was interesting i'll give it that, but it was just another teenage American girl finding true love. Oh sorry, forbidden love, blah blah, the usual. When suddenly, I felt myself dive right into the thoughts and feelings of Bella. I don't know what triggered it, what specific part made me realise this, but something must have. I thought for the first time how much I am alike Bella. The clumsyness, the 'never-quite-fitting-in-anywhere', the difference between me and other people, how I over-analyse, over-react, over-think things, how even when thingsa are meant to scare me they don't, how other girls are so.. girly. Not that I'm not, I wear make-up, a skirt, stuff like that. But i'm stronger than the other girls without having any sort of reason for being so, how silly things like hatting me don't make me scream like others. And how I look upon life as an adult rather than the teenager I am meant to be, seeing the world as a whole rather than as the little bubble of our friends in school.
The only thing seperating me from her (apart from name and appearance), is the fact that I don't find trouble wherever I go. Well not usually. (Although Bella never did in Phoenix anyway so that might not be her trait it could just be in Forks)

And as you may have guessed i'm currently, just this minute, re-reading Twilight. Thats why I decided to write this.. stuff.

So I leave you with my strange thoughts there,

Sharnie xx